RIDDLES

Q: Why is that dog running in circles?

A: Its a watchdog,and its winding itself up.

Q:What did the five-hundred-pound mouse say when it walked down the alley?

A: Here kitty,kitty,kitty

Q: Why does the baby duck walk softly?

A: Because its a baby and it cant walk,hardly.

Q: Why does a cow wear a bell?

A: Its horns don't work.

Q: What did the baby porcupine say when it backed into the cactus?

A: Is that you,mother?

Q: What did the angry octopus say to the that made him angry octopus?

A: One of these days....POW,POW,POW,POW,POW right in the kisser.

Q: what did one eye say to the other?

A: There's something between us that smells.

Q: What did one toe say to another toe?

A: Don't look now,but there's a heel following us.

Q: What do you do if you smashed your toe?

A: you call a tow truck.

Q: What is a ring leader?

A: The first one in a bathtub.

Q: Why does an elephant have a trunk?

A: So that it has someplace to hid when it sees a mouse.

Q: Why does an elephant like peanuts?

A: It can send in the wrapper for prizes.

[UP]

JOKES

Q: There are two cows in a field and one says, "What do you think about Mad Cow Disease?"

A: The other cow says, "I'm not worried because I'm a RABBIT!"

Q: what happens when pigs fly?

A: Bacon goes up!

Q: Why do witches use brooms for flying?

A: Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy!

Q: What is the difference between a jeweler and a jailor?

A: A jeweler sells watches and a jailor watches cells!

Q: Polly, I think my teacher loves me. Why's that?

A: She keeps putting "X"s next to my work!!

Q: Why didn't the clock work?

A: Because it needed a hand.

Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

A: Because chickens weren't invented then.

Q: What car does a Teddy Bear drive?

A: Toy-ota

Q: What does Santa do in his garden all day?

A: Ho! Ho! Ho!

Q: What's black, white and red all over?

A: A sunburst penguin!

Q: Did you hear about the magic tractor?

A: It turns into a field!!

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